The FBI Wants Your ISP To Spy On You

… and keep your web history logged for up to 2 years. Land of the free, eh? What’s almost as troubling as the privacy implications is the fact that the FBI apparently doesn’t even know what exactly they want to the ISP to store, yet. The FBI just feels like they should be allowed to do this, and fuck you if you don’t like it.

It’s amazing to me that spying on American citizens with no probable cause is an OK thing to talk about in public, now. How did we get here?

South Carolina “Subversives” Must Now Pay $5 Fee

This is, apparently, not a joke. They actually expect people who are planning to overthrow the US Government to register with them, and pay $5 for the privilege of filling out a form that explains their plans.

Somewhere, Kurt Vonnegut can’t believe this shit.

Jesper On Staying “Above Execution”

The Universal Approach:

… this pattern is evidently sane, well-tested and produces good results: talk to people. Figure out what they want. Don’t rely on them telling you what they want, and don’t rely on you knowing what they want. Figure out a way to separate what they want from how they want it, which problem they want solved from how they want it solved, and work towards delivering that in the most appropriate way possible. Do rely on them and yourself telling you what they like.

In response to this Joshua Prince-Ramus 2009 TED Talk.

Microsoft Responds to Dick Brass’ NYT Op-Ed

… and it’s hard to imagine how they could’ve done a worse job. As Gruber notes, not only was there no reason to respond, but they don’t even engage the original article in a meaningful way.

Microsoft’s reply is the equivalent of saying “Well, yeah, but… look over there at this other thing.” but with a lot more words.

MPEGLA Announces H.264 To Remain Royalty-Free (For Free Content) Until 2016

This is a good thing, for now, but licensing-wise H.264 is actually probably worse than Flash. It works great with a hardware decoder, but why should I trust the MPEGLA to not pull the rug out from under the internet in 6 years? Of note: The 2016 deadline only applies to “Internet Video that is Free to End Users.” Who gets to define “free?”

The press release should’ve been subtitled “Your Move, Adobe.”

HipHop for PHP

What appears to be a PHP/C++ cross-compiler. This could be some serious mojo for PHP. That name is awful, though.

Jeffrey Zeldman on Flash, the iPad, and Standards

You can always count on Zeldman to say things like

As the percentage of web users on non-Flash-capable platforms grows, developers who currently create Flash experiences with no fallbacks will have to rethink their strategy and start with the basics before adding a Flash layer. They will need to ensure that content and experience are delivered with or without Flash.

But it’s still good to have him say them.

New(!) Bill Watterson Interview

A rare interview with the reclusive artist/author. I adored Calvin & Hobbes as a child, and having re-read some recently, I am confident my love was well-placed.

“Why are you so terribly disappointing?”

Mark Morford for SFGate:

Big f–ing deal. We just do not care. It’s all a big disappointment. Hey, I was expecting to be blown away. I was expecting miracles and transformations and multiple twitching orgasms on sight. Do not come at me with tantalizing promises only to reveal that you can fulfill most of them to a fairly good degree, and not far exceed all of them in every imaginable way. We’re Americans, goddammit. Ye shall know us by the tang of our bitter and untenable jadedness.

It is an old sentiment, expressed well.

John Scalzi on the Amazon / Macmillan Spat

In a post titled “All The Many Ways Amazon So Very Failed the Weekend,” he goes into short detail along the very lines you might expect.

Amazon so badly mis-handled this situation that one wonders if the entire company wasn’t under the spell of a wizard, or if a very strong sedative was released into the ventilation system.

“Wasp Knife” Freezes Victims’ Organs

This is a part of our Grim Meathook Future. The knife’s handle houses a small cartridge of compressed gas which, when activated, exits from a small shaft in the blade.

Roger Ebert’s Worst films of 2009

If you need a quick shot of confidence in the whole cinematic endeavor, you will not get it here. What you will get is Ebert being his Ebert-y best.

Australia Bans Female Ejaculation, Small Breasts

Buried in this release about the censorship of porn films are nuggets like this:

The Board has also started to ban depictions of small-breasted women in adult publications and films.

Waiting for there to be an A-cup political action committed formed with the slogan “from my cold dead hands.”

Steven Frank on New World Computing, the iPad, and Generational Shift

The newly-Americanized Steve knocks it out of the park. There is a big shift happening under the layers we walk on, and most people won’t see it for a few years yet.

Cfxr, An OSX Port of sfxr

It’s an 8-bit-style sound effects generator, and it’s a heck of a lot of fun. Useful for game mock-ups, too. Maybe even production.

David Simon: “Fuck The Average Viewer”

An interview with the creator of The Wire and Homicide: Life on the Streets, from March 2009.

Psychonauts is $2 on Steam Right Now

You are doing yourself a great disservice by not playing this game.

Lookwell

Conan O’Brien and Robert Smigel’s 1991 television pilot, starring Adam West.